These 7 ways to become a discouraged mom give you a guide on how to not only become disheartened, but also will help you stay in a pit of despair. I’m sure many of you will find it helpful. While you are here, you could also check out these “I’ll never…” parenting lies. It might encourage you. Oh – Never mind. Don’t go there. We’re focusing on discouragement today.
7 Ways to Become a Discouraged Mom
- Isolate Yourself – One sure fire way to become discouraged as a mom is to isolate yourself. When you isolate yourself you get to feel alone in the journey. You don’t get to swap stories that make you laugh or cry. There is no one to ask your myriad of questions to, and you won’t have wise mentors that you can observe as they raise their kids. Another bonus is that you won’t get to see that other kids actually whine and cry to get what they want, hit other kids, lie and have a hard time sharing. You can continue to feel like your child is the only one who has behavior issues. Make sure not to get to know your neighbors because then you are stuck with people near by who actually might want to be your friends.
- Focus on the Negative – I encourage you to focus on the negative. Please ignore posts that give helpful tips to fix your attitude or make the most of the mundane. It’s much better to be irritated with life. The laundry and dishes never stop. Parenting is challenging. The house is a mess. Marriage is hard work. Keep all of that clearly in sight, and please don’t be thankful for your house, spouse, children, friends or family.
- Try and Be a Supermom – You can do it all, and don’t let anyone tell you different. You have no excuse. Sure you have a newborn, a toddler and a a first grader. How hard can it really be? You should still keep your house perfect, have a healthy organic meal on the table every evening and a Pinterest perfect party for every occasion. Make sure you are exercising daily, making meals for friends who need extra encouragement, have well-behaved children all the time and never let them watch TV. Actually, just throw that thing out the window. Real moms don’t use devices to pacify children. I once was a supermom, and there’s no reason why you can’t be one too.
- Do Not Keep Things in Perspective – The here and now is all that matters. After all, you never know if tomorrow will even happen. Ignore this post. It’s all bad advice. If today was horrible, please don’t even imagine tomorrow will be any better. The season you are in, it will be here for a long time. Don’t let older women tell you, “It passes quickly. Enjoy it.” You know better than that! Today seemed to take forever, right? Just multiply that by 18 years. It’s only logical that this whole parenting thing is going to go by at a snail’s pace. Whatever emotion you are feeling today will be the way you feel the rest of your life. Please, please do not keep things in perspective. It’s much better to stay discouraged.
- Compare Yourself to Others – See those smiling faces on Facebook? They just went to Disneyland. Look at that family picture. Their kids aren’t crying and screaming like yours were last time you tried to get the perfect photo. That couple is out on a date night. Your marriage isn’t anything compared to what that woman has. Comparing yourself keeps it real. Make sure to compare your lowest moments with everyone else’s highlights. I’ve heard it said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Who needs joy if you want to continue in disappointment? As long as you are comparing yourself to other moms, please make sure to judge them. It will make you feel better about yourself. Trust me.
- Be Inconsistent in Your Parenting – One sure fire way to become miserable is to be inconsistent. Consistency is for type-A sissies, and it doesn’t allow your children the freedom of self-regulation and self-expression. If they know what to expect in your home, how can you teach them about how to be flexible or become a problem solver? Some may claim that consistency in your home creates stability and confident kids. Don’t listen. They may even encourage you to adopt helpful parenting phrases. Don’t do it. You want to sometimes respond angry and sometimes in grace and love. Make sure to sometimes let our children get away with disrespect and disobedience while other times come down on them hard, giving consequences that make sense. It keeps them on their toes. The inconsistency in your parenting will result in inconsistency in your child’s behavior. It keeps you on your toes. It’s a win, win.
- Don’t Set Boundaries for Your Kids – It’s important to let your kids make their own rules. We want free thinkers who can make their own decisions. Sure they don’t have wisdom, brain maturity or life experience, but they’ll learn through trial and error. If we teach them to obey we put their lives at risk. Creating rules and then enforcing them at home, at school or in a job is oppressive. Do you really want your children to feel confined in that way? You are squashing their personality and ideas. Stop it! Your kids may end up ruling the roost, but that’s better than children who are stifled, right?
The truth is, I hope you will not follow the advice here. I want to see moms encouraged and finding joy in parenting. This is probably the worst parenting advice you have been given, so please visit this post for some of the best parenting advice out there.