Holly got ready.
Ready for something she hasn’t done in years.
Holly realized that she had only
one pair of jeans that fit well. She had no choice but to go shopping for
another pair.
Why has Holly not been jean shopping for years?
Maybe because last time she went shopping for jeans she
entered the store as
a confident woman and
exited the store as
a huddled mass yearning to be free of her obvious body disfigurements.
For you see, in
non-jean-shopping-life Holly is OK with her body. She is not in love with her shape, but has accepted it and moves on…
Yet for some reason, in
jean-shopping-life all that changes.
Holly’s
non-jean-shopping THIGHS are OK, but her
jean-shopping THIGHS appear like over-stuffed, dimpled sausage.
Holly’s
non-jean-shopping WAIST is OK, but her
jean-shopping WAIST creates plumber-effect.
In
non-jean shopping-life Holly never met a tailor. In
jean-shopping-life Holly has never met a pair of jeans that didn’t require a skilled one.
Holly recruited a friend for moral support.
Holly wasn’t sure about the morality, but could really use the support.
Soon Holly was back in a dressing room with an ever-growing pile of ill-fitting jeans.
*Hold me*
Just about the time Holly was about to slip into her pre-existing Post-Traumatic Jean Shopping Syndrome, the sales clerk asked her to try on one more pair.
Holly tried on the jeans.
Holly was puzzled.
Something was different.
Very different.
The jeans fit.
*cue the angel choir*
Where did you find these jeans that fit so perfectly?
The men’s department.
Yep.
In
jean-shopping-life Holly is a
boy.
Holly realized that she had only one pair of jeans that fit well. She had no choice but to go shopping for another pair.
Why has Holly not been jean shopping for years?
Maybe because last time she went shopping for jeans she entered the store as a confident woman and exited the store as a huddled mass yearning to be free of her obvious body disfigurements.
For you see, in non-jean-shopping-life Holly is OK with her body. She is not in love with her shape, but has accepted it and moves on…
Yet for some reason, in jean-shopping-life all that changes.
Holly’s non-jean-shopping THIGHS are OK, but her jean-shopping THIGHS appear like over-stuffed, dimpled sausage.
Holly’s non-jean-shopping WAIST is OK, but her jean-shopping WAIST creates plumber-effect.
In non-jean shopping-life Holly never met a tailor. In jean-shopping-life Holly has never met a pair of jeans that didn’t require a skilled one.
Holly recruited a friend for moral support. Holly wasn’t sure about the morality, but could really use the support.
Soon Holly was back in a dressing room with an ever-growing pile of ill-fitting jeans.
*Hold me*
Just about the time Holly was about to slip into her pre-existing Post-Traumatic Jean Shopping Syndrome, the sales clerk asked her to try on one more pair.
Holly tried on the jeans.
Holly was puzzled.
Something was different.
Very different.
The jeans fit.
*cue the angel choir*
Where did you find these jeans that fit so perfectly?
The men’s department.
Yep.
In jean-shopping-life Holly is a boy.
this is awesome. jeans shopping is a nightmare, but i think you’re still ahead of the curve: men’s jeans beat mom jeans any day of the week:)
I’m visiting from Nanny Goats in Panties blog. Loved this post cause now I know I’m not the only one that wear’s a pair of men’s jeans…Have a great weekend!
Oh how I love those drawings. I just went Jean shopping. Five different stores – no jeans. Maybe I should try mens.
Oh my goodness. Holly you do not need to wear men’s jeans in 2009. I did that in the 80’s because I had no choice. Go buy yourself a pair of Joe’s Jeans, they’ll have a fit for you, they come in lengths, and they were made for your gorgeous body.
Men’s jeans are great! I used to wear them before I popped out a couple of babies and my shape changed for ever and ever.
in jean shopping life, you take whatever works…i have a few pairs of jeans from THE KID SECTION AT OLD NAVY. hahah!
I had a brilliant comment, almost certainly “peep of the week” worthy. then I read Danielle’s comment *sigh* How can I comment after reading that little gem..
Oh my gosh, I’m going to totally try the men’s next time…will I need to bring a sock? or do they provide that…like a nylon at the shoe store?
stinking jeans…… i started buying them at coldwater creek…
I was just thinking the same thing as Joy the Baker. Thanks for the laugh!!!