Holly’s middle son,
Reid is turning six this week.
Happy birthday Reid!
Because Reid’s mother is
not the actual June Cleaver, Holly needed to purchase cakes.
She needed two –
one for a family party on Sunday and
one for a kid party on Wednesday.
Load up the minivan!
Holly is going to Target…
Because Holly has been to Target a few times, she knows right where the bakery is located.
Holly let’s Reid pick out the cakes he wants from the
handy-dandy three ring binder display in front of the bakery security glass.
Reid wants the
Dinosaur Attack cake.
Reid wants the
Indiana Jones cake with the super cool boulder.
In a bit of foreshadowing, Holly wonders why Target bakery employees need the security of glass to separate them from their customers.
Holly notices that the
Target bakery employees don’t seem to be very interested in the cake ordering process.
Holly notices that
her three boys don’t seem very interested in the cake ordering process.
Holly notices that the
Target bakery employees are hiding behind the security glass.
Holly notices that
her three boys are hiding at multiple locations throughout the Target Super Center.
Holly finally gets the attention of the correct
Target bakery employee to order her cakes.
She requests a
Dinosaur Attack cake in a 1/4 sheet to feed 12 people.
The
Target bakery employees are HORRIFIED that she would request such a thing.
The
Target bakery employees inform Holly
under no uncertain circumstances are
Dinosaur Attack cakes sold in
that size or
for a reasonable price.
Dinosaur Attack cakes are only available in ONE size (
no exceptions) and for the price of
$39.99 (
no exceptions).
Holly
loves over-paying and having left-overs so she readily agrees.
She then orders the
Indiana Jones cake with the super cool boulder which doesn’t seem to be under the same
size and price restrictions.
Holly then has to pick out the cake flavor,
the cake frosting,
the cake lettering,
the cake
blah, blah, blah…
Holly
lost track of all the cake decisions.
Holly
lost track of time.
Holly l
ost track of three boys.
Just when Holly was about to leave and look for her children, the
Target bakery employee mentioned that they should check and see if they had the
Dinosaur Attack and
Indiana Jones with the super cool boulder cake kits.
“Target can not accept the order of a cake without the cake kit IN HAND.”
The
Target bakery employee returned with
bad news.
No
Dinosaur Attack.
No
Indiana Jones with the super cool boulder.
Holly has just
invested the last
26 minutes of her life into these cakes.
Holly has just
promised to pay an outlandish sum of money for these cakes.
Holly is taking home these cakes.
Holly politely requests that the
Target bakery employee call another Target bakery.
It appears that all the Targets within a 30 mile radius are out of the cake kits that Reid has requested.
Holly is a little confused.
If these cakes are so
popular, why not order a few
extra kits?
The Target bakery employee informs Holly that they are only allowed to
order three kits per cake style every 11 days.
Holly does some quick calculations in her head…
Holly was about to solve the
Target cake kit shortage when she glanced at the time.
Crap!
Holly has been in the Target bakery for
42 minutes and only has 18 minutes to do all the rest of her shopping and check out.
Holly is 0-2 in the cake department.
Just then Holly notices a
flash of activity in front of her.
Just then Holly recognizes the
flash as one of her three missing children.
First the
flash,
then the
BANG.
Oh! and another
BANG.
And that was followed by a
waterfall-type effect…
One of Holly’s bored children released the three rings in both binders which caused EVERY SINGLE
CAKE DISPLAY PAGE to fall to the ground.
Holly tries to remain calm in Target’s bakery.
Against all odds.
When the
Target bakery employee suggested that Holly should purchase the cakes as ordered (
except of course there are no kits) and
go buy toys from the toy section to place on the cake, Holly realized
why there was
security glass between her and the employee.
Holly also realized that she has wasted another 5 minutes cleaning up the three ring binder mess and that she better hurry if anyone was getting cake, toys to go on the cake, or dinner.
Holly went to the toy aisle for
dinosaurs and
Indiana Jones action figures.
Holly soon found that a package of
dinosaurs cost $19.99 and that the
Indiana Jones action figures have been
discontinued.
Holly did more math in her head: $39.99
cake + $19.99
dinosaurs = Holly
not having to go out and try to find something cheaper later.
Holly also mentally evaluated the
Indiana Jones cake with the super cool boulder. Holly agreed to ANY toy that Reid suggested (
Star Wars) because
theoretically it couldn’t be
called an
Indiana Jones cake if there wasn’t
actually anything Indiana Jones about it.
So Holly went home with some expensive
dinosaurs and the promise of a
Star Wars cake with a super cool boulder.
When Holly returned to Target’s bakery
for the first cake she was
delighted to notice that the
price on the cake was not what she expected.
Holly was super proud of herself for not having a mental breakdown in the middle of Target’s bakery.
She
quietly mentioned that the price of
$46.99 was higher than the promised
$39.99 and that her cake DIDN’T EVEN COME WITH A KIT.
A different
Target bakery employee realized the beginning of
Target bakery rage and
quietly reduced the price.
Holly went home with her
super expensive cake.
And then added the
super expensive dinosaurs.
And then admitted it was a
super great cake – so great that it’s volcanic lava defied gravity.
One cake down and only one to go…
Holy stinking freaking snapping crazy WHAT THE HECK!??
I would not have held up so well.. my dear don’t they have safeways in your world? I now know where to NEVER attempt to purchase a bday cake.
I was totally gobsmacking P-Oed the last time I bought a cake and it was $19!
As always, great fabulous terrific pictures… oh my gosh!
I hope the end result was worth the hassle. It really is a cool cake. Your drawings are terrific and I always enjoy your mom stories. I can’t imagine the nerve it takes to enter a Super Target with three boys in tow.
Our Target has a funky escalator, but no bakery! I think I am glad…
My grandkids always pick the most expensive cakes, too…….and guess what……I would have done EXACTLY what you did.
Great cake. I’m sure it was worth the gray hairs, and look at the bright side for Target. They know their security glass is high enough.
Poor poor Mommy! (Get cupcakes and let them decorate them in the backyard with rocks and dirt.) 🙂
Hey, your blog’s not updating in my reader. Says the last post was 3 weeks ago, so I was dropping in to see if you’d been hauled off by CPS or Target. LOL
Gremlin ALWAYS picks out a cake/party theme that our bakery doesn’t carry. The little WALL-E toy on top? $20.00. And it fell into the frosting and totally effed up the cake.
I think you should raffle off the left over cake along with the Little Debbies.
Your Target has a bakery?
LOL You might have been better off order from Frosted Art/Neiman Marcus 😉
I’m impressed that stick figure Holly kept her little red smile firmly in place the entire time. If this story had been about stick figure Melanie she would have been making this expression: >:-0
I’m reeling at the $39.99 for the cake. X 2? Argh! I get a Costco sheet cake and add my own decorations. Yours did turn out great and you have brand-new dinosaurs to play with. And no Target employees were harmed in the making of the cakes–which is a credit to you.