This was the scene last time the Nirvana covered the Optimus Prime story (November 2008): Optimus Prime, recognized leader of the Autobots was found hung from the Nirvana boys’ bunkbed at 6:02 p.m., Sunday, November 9, 2008. There was no indication of foul play. The homeowner, Texasholly reports that the scene has remained untouched awaiting the Major Case Squad’s further evaluation. Texasholly went on to say that neither she, nor anyone else living in the house has any affiliation with the Decepticons. Where is he now? It appears that Optimus Prime may have had help in faking his death in an attempt to relieve himself of the pressures of   Autobot leadership. Despite the grizzly details from his November 2008 “accident”, he made a full recovery and has been living under the Autobot/Decepticon   radar. He now resides happily in the suburbs of Texas with a colony of faux-snakes.



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46 Comments

  1. I am here to report that the real Optimus Prime is alive and well in Chicago where they are filming Transformers 3. All the studio trailers are parked in a lot the movie company has leased for the summer on Halsted, across from my daughters apartment.

  2. One of my coworkers in the army had a japanese barbie type doll names Meeko. His room mates did such mean things to her. She was hung by her neck with a fake suicide note on her, placed in the convection oven, etc. Your boys sure have a good imagination…

  3. Very funny! My only question,

    Is there a name still written on the bottom of Optimus Primes foot or does it appear to have been washed off?

    Hmmm… suspicious behavior at the Nirvana house…

  4. I love you. You’re the only one I know that can make the devistation of losing an Autobot into the perfect blog post.

    btw-what happened to your blingy background?