This brings up the whole subject of blogging as therapy…which I will save for another day.
*random photo alert*
They will debate the most inane things.
Passionately.
Accompanied by screaming.
Every good argument contains screaming.
One of the most passionately debated topic at each and every breakfast has to do with whether Reid(7) who sits in between Ryan(9) and Rhett(4) at the kitchen counter should be able to eat toast while sitting at the breakfast bar with his brothers.
Toast.
The nerve of that child to want to eat TOAST!
What is wrong with toast?
Rhett who has been vehemently ANTI-bread for the last year claims that toast stinks SO BAD THAT HE MIGHT THROW UP IF SOMEONE EATS IT IN HIS PRESENCE.
He demands a 15 foot no-toast zone around him at all times.
Does this apply to all toast, or are there exemptions?
This rule only applies to REGULAR TOAST.
REGULAR TOAST is defined as any plain white or wheat toast.
You may enter the no-toast zone if you are eating SPECIAL TOAST.
SPECIAL TOAST is defined as any Pepperidge Farm Swirl Cinnamon toast as long as it does not contain raisins.
Rhett requests that if you MUST eat REGULAR TOAST that you do so at the kitchen table which is 15 feet away rendering it out of the no-toast zone.
This morning Reid was a little fed up with the enforcement of the no-toast zone and decided to rebel.
He sat next to Rhett at the kitchen counter and ate toast with exaggerated toast eating motions.
One or two of those exaggerated toast eating motions might have even hit Rhett in the head.
One or two of those exaggerated toast eating motions might have deposited strawberry jam in Rhett’s hair.
Don’t even get me started on the no-strawberry-jam zone.
But worst of all, one or two of those exaggerated toast eating motions created toast stench wind.
Let’s just say it was not well received.
At all.
After I separated the toast eating from the non-toast eating, I looked back at the remaining breakfast participator, Ryan.
Ryan looked up and said, “WHY is Rhett that way? Why can’t we eat toast around him? Why is he so sensitive?”
I have no idea, but suspect that it is genetic because I have dealt with this issue in the past.
Twice.
Once 5 years ago with Ryan.
Once 3 years ago with Reid.
Evey single one of my boys went through a phase where toast stunk.
Greatings, Come On
Boldy
Oh, mine just have the “beat the hell out of each other for no apparent reason” zone. Today it was because of armpit stink – which I will readily admit is becoming a major issue as these boys mature. (Though, the teenage daughter wins the sweat stink contest hands down. Especially if you are locked in a car after a game w/ 13 and her shin guards, soccer shoes and goalie gloves all removed. *urp*)
Tonight however the younger brother came in crying because older bro told him he had to sit on the other side of the room because he doesn’t simply have armpits, he has BARBARIAN pits. Indeed.
I feel like those clumsy, unrefined people who can’t tell the difference between american cheese and camembert.
I’ve never found the smell of toast objectionable.
I am an uncouth clod.
Oh, this brings back memories of fighting with my sister. I never let her sing “lead” AND “back up” to the car radio. She had to pick. I guess I had “sensitive ears.” 😉 Thanks for the laugh!
(And I think Jennifer, above, might just be right.)
Too funny. Sorry I probably shouldn’t be laughing. I have an extra sensitive nose too, but can’t say that I’ve ever detested toast.
I can only assume that the No Toast Zone overlaps generously with the Mommy Drinks Wine Before Noon Zone.
Boys will ALWAYS be older than girls. That is our morning’s argument between the 6 and 8-year-olds. The 8-year-old was exasperating herself trying to use reason. Reason! Like you can do that with a 6-year-old boy. 6-year-old girls? Another story. And then the 16-year-old boy jumped into the mix (he is the Official Source of Information for the 6-year-old boy, who also, thanks to the brother, believes newborn babies are expelled from the mother’s body through the left nostril) and it is still going on. Now the 18-year-old sister is into the mix trying to reason with the 16-year-old boy. Rreason! Like you can do that with a 16-year-old boy. The fact that both girls are older than the arguing boys is just a minor detail that is being ignored. Because boys are ALWAYS older than girls.
Toast smell is certainly worth getting into a brawl about. Did you say something brilliant like “well just breathe through your mouth and you won’t smell it!”? I love it when the rational brain takes leave and you devolve into a six year old.
Mine alternate with sensitive ears. Ears that are so sensitive crunchy snacks cannot be eaten around them while they are talking or watching something on TV. Not even in the same room. Because gold fish crackers make so much noise when they are being eaten the sensitive child cannot hear anything but them. crunch crunch crunch. even if the eater is 4 yards away.So the tv must be turned up extra loud to be heard over the goldfish or the speaker must start yelling to be heard over the goldfish
I, too, am sensitive to smells and sometimes think toast stinks. Especially when I’m trying to sleep in! But sometimes it’s just yummy toasted goodness, so I don’t know…