I have been brainwashing the boys that I will choose a wife for them. This way when I back down and just request veto power it will look reasonable. All in the master plan…mwah. ha. ha…
In my quest to raise quality girl bait, I am teaching the obvious manners. I have encountered some less obvious areas that I need to work on here at the house with the boys. These are things that may be age appropriate now, but would be serious red flags to any girl worth her salt.
Here is my list of things that might be OK at 2-4 years old, but definitely NOT even remotely OK at 24 years old:
1. Binkys, sippy cups, and only eating on plastic plates.
2. Sleeping in a crib.
3. Running down to mommy and daddy’s bed in the middle of the night and climbing in.
4. Sitting on mommy’s lap while she pees.
5. Hanging out with mommy while she is in the shower.
6. Screaming “wipe me!” after pooping on the potty.
7. Enjoying a good “potty dance” as performed by mommy.
8. Peek-a-boo games with everyone.
9. Requesting food be cut into small pieces.
10. Bathing in a small tub with 2 other brothers.
11. Sneaking to eat toothpaste from the tube.
12. Calling McDonald’s “Old McDonalds”.
13. Eating “regular food” only to qualify for dessert status.
14. Wearing a blue power ranger suit 24/7.
15. Wearing Transformer underwear.
16. Wearing footed PJs.
17. Tricycle is only means of independent transportation.
18. Believing the finest food is served at Chuck E. Cheese.
19. Throwing tantrums on a whim.
20. Still living with mommy and daddy.
CRAP. I didn’t account for the obvious red flag of future mother-in-law with a detailed trapping plan…
ONE pair of Transformer underwear is kitschy and nostalgic and fun. ONLY Transformer underwear is a little weird (in a 24 year old).
We seem to be losing some of our manners since starting public school. This is one of my fave posts….=)
Ouch, you described an ex-boyfriend from college.