Last time we flew we took crazy baby without a car seat. This was a serious mistake. I had planned on taking the car seat on the plane with us, but the curbside check-in guy said it would not fit and we needed to check it. I should have realized that his judgement was impaired when he subsequently held our luggage and my ID hostage for a tip. This trip I was not going to be swayed by greedy curbside check-in guy. Nope, I was mommy on a mission toward a peaceful flight. Last time we needed a treadmill for crazy baby between mommy and daddy. This time I was planning a book to read. Last time we pulled crazy baby from exploring the aisle. This time I was hoping to catch up on some ipod tunes. Last time we restrained crazy baby from smiling and waving to fellow disinterested and annoyed travelers. This time I was hoping to be one of those disinterested and annoyed travelers.
A friend let us borrow this cool contraption that created a stroller out of crazy baby’s car seat. It was brilliant. We flew all over the airport with the greatest of ease. When boarding, we breezed through first class and then…STOP! The aisle through coach was not wide enough to accommodate crazy baby and his car seat/stroller contraption. Quick thinking resulted in crazy baby, car seat and contraption hoisted over head by two adults like a traveling sultan parading to his assigned window seat. The contraption required removal for airplane seat placement, but soon crazy baby was nestled sweetly in his window seat strapped into his car seat and attached to the plane by the seat belt. The 30 degree recline in the car seat made crazy baby’s feet sit squarely on the back of the seat back in front of him. I was looking forward to the time when we could recline the seat so we could scoot the whole thing back and relieve the poor traveler to our front from continuous crazy baby exuberance. When we were in the air and able to recline, I adjusted the plane seat the generous additional inches of recline which release some, but not all of the space between the car seat and the seat back. I then tightened the seat belt to reflect the adjustment. The flight was enjoyable with crazy baby realizing that he was a confined passenger and not a circus performer. When the flight was over and our fellow travelers were deplaning, blog-Stedman went to the task of releasing the car seat from the plane to attach to the handy roller contraption. Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock…there was blog-Stedman still trying to release the carseat…tick, tock, tick, tock…I step in to solve the problem…you may have noticed in the plane educational lecture that the seat belt can be released by lifting the metal tab to a 90 degree angle. You may have also noticed at some time that if you stick your hand into the car seat channel that holds a seat belt that your knuckles get skinned and it in no way will accommodate opening a stiff metal hinge lodged into the middle of the channel to a 90 degree angle. Great! Crazy baby is now destined to a life of plane travel from here to the next stop and beyond. Too bad for the poor person assigned to his seat on the next leg of the trip. In an effort to capture more time with my baby, I continue to push, shove, pull, stretch, twist and rotate the car seat in an effort to release it from the grips of the archaic metal hinged seat belt. In a helpful, supportive announcement, the flight attendants then announce that we HAVE to get off the plane so the cleaning crew can come aboard. Yeah, that is my main concern now…the cleanliness of the plane that has eaten my car seat. Finally, after reclining all the seats and wedging the car seat between my leg pushed against the plane window and my arm twisting toward the middle seat, it releases. My sweaty body rejoices that crazy baby can continue on our journey and not be at the mercy of American Airlines. This further proves the point that my suburban angst is on a road trip.



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8 Comments

  1. I was getting really anxious just reading that! I was expecting the jaws of life to make an appearance in this post!

  2. HA HA thanks for the funny funny movie running thru my head. we too have had that car seat/stroller thingy .. We too thought It was the best invention ever until it did not fit down the Aisle.( like they said it would on TV) WE too got skinned knuckles trying to save our poor child from being a traveling side show. HA Had we known then what we know now maybe we would have left him there. SOunds like you are having a great time. we would like more adventures please.. I am living thru you..

  3. I think the skinned knuckles on the airplane/carseat combo. are a rite of passage for all of motherhood. It is still worth it to have crazy baby restrained, right?!

  4. I did that EXACT same thing with Reese’s carseat the first time he flew as a baby! I tore up my knuckles trying to unbuckle the seatbelt. I was half-panicked thinking it would never come out!

  5. Ha! My sister is gonna LOVE this post. She just went through the same thing! Hi Quart!

    Glad you all made it in one piece, even if it took some time!

  6. The whole the plane ate the carseat aside, it sounds like the flight went pretty smoothly. I mean, you live to tell the tale. That’s something, isn’t it?

  7. Glad you survived! We now risk not having car seats on the plane (no sherpa duties for the hubby)as the car seats seemed to create feet as weapons to strike the seat in front – as you mentioned. We do have to be prepared for laps in the aisle now though…