So sorry! I had no idea I was hideously disfigured…

Last week I went with a girlfriend to have our make-up done at a local department store. It was a very nice department store. So nice that I had never even been inside it.

We ate lunch at a chic bistro and walked down to Barney’s for our 1 pm appt. We were seeing Jeff who was a traveling MAC rep. and wizard of all things make-up. She sat down in Jeff’s chair first and I sat down for face preparation work with one of Jeff’s assistant. We were treated like queens and were laughing and joking so much that periodically make-up application ceased to allow us to double over. Jeff finished with my friend’s make-up and she looked glamorous. I sat down in his chair. He took a look straight in my face:
Jeff: *serious inhale gasp* Girl, who does your brows?
me: nobody
Jeff: *hand to heart, stepping back in horror* Can I fix that for you?
me: I’ll take all the help I can get
Jeff: *scrambling for tweezers* I used to shape brows and have in my mind exactly what you need
me: great
Jeff: *still scrambling for tweezers, now frantically* Where are my tweezers?

At this point a full on tweezers hunt in Barney’s was on. Jeff had left his out of his make-up bag. Every other make-up artist in the store was now searching fervently for their tweezers. When this resulted in no tweezers a discussion group ensued about where to go PURCHASE tweezers in the mall. Then Jeff had a light bulb moment:

Jeff: Oh, I forgot! I am in Dallas. My little button is just down the hall!

He raced to the phone and made a call. It was a fashion 911 call to his little button. He returned triumphant in the news. “My little button can fit you in RIGHT NOW, but we have to get moving.” So, Jeff and his assistant, my dear friend and I parade out of Barney’s little button bound. I have to admit that I had no idea what was going on at this point, but it was an adventure and I was obviously in serious need of this attention.

Little button turned out to be a very nice make-up artist at the mall Lancombe store who had worked previously with Jeff. She drew, waxed, plucked and primped the heck out of my brows and when she was done she spun my chair around and huge sigh of relief erupted in the room. I had been saved from my low maintenance ways. It was fixed. The make-over could now continue…

Which it did and when completed I looked super fabulous. Yeah!


  1. Momo Fali says:

    I need brow intervention every two weeks. It’s crazy. It’s like a crazed Chia Pet above my eyes. And, my poor five year old son has a unibrow thanks to me. One of these days, without my husband knowing, I’m sneaking the kid out for a brow wax.

  2. Lil Mouse says:

    i was in a salon once where this 14 year old boy was getting his done. at least i think so, i didnt have my glasses on, but they were saying the girls would appreciate it, and he was in the shampoo/brow chair and not the haircut chair, and no hair dryer ensued.

    anyway, i’m long overdue but i spend a lot of time with tweezers so i have a decent shape.

    tip: dont do your makeup, or just get it done early in the morning along with your haircut, etc and put on your makeup later. your brows can look red and your foundation should cover it.

  3. standing still says:

    before and after photos would be just too much to ask, i’m sure …

  4. fullheartandhands mama says:

    Too funny! I’ve never done anything about my eyebrows. They are pretty sparse and light, but maybe I should?

  5. I had mine done on Tuesday and my very good friend and hairstylist Kim, said about the same thing. She will wax them and when she pulls the wax off she always says something like “Oh my goodness, you had a caterpillar growing on your head”

  6. A Mom Two Boys says:

    Oh yay! Jeff sounds like my kinda guy. Well, you know what I mean. He actually sounds exactly NOT like my “kinda” guy, but more like the kind of guy I’d like to spend a day with, putting on make up and looking at shoes. Am I right?

    Brows are often overlooked and underrated, but doesn’t it make a HUGE difference? It’s crazy. Grandmaother even has a brow lady she goes to specifically for her brows. She’s known around Sacramento as the “Eyebrow Queen.” Really, she is.

  7. Sister Honey Bunch says:

    I always feel so much better after my brows are waxed. I want to see pictures of your makeover!

  8. I had a similar situation once. That is exactly why I get them waxed faithfully, which reminds me, they need done.

  9. I am SOOO not on board with the whole brow thing. Now, I dont like a uni or anything like that, but I like my brows to be substantial just over the eye. I get the stragglers going over the temple, the occassional strays on the lid area, all the ones in between and on top, but I hate the look of tiny brows and using a pencil to shape them back in. I don’t get that!

  10. One word comes to mind when I think of brow waxing…or any waxing for that matter…OUCH!

  11. Happy Campers says:

    WHERE are the pictures girl? Come ON…you’re letting us Blog world people down 🙂

    I had my brows done once about 8 years ago. LOVED the way they looked. Haven’t been back. Is it time to go back? Once every 8 years?

  12. Dre the Texican says:

    Yes, once every 8 years! Love it. I got electrolysis on my brows. Hurt like hell but 100% worth it! No more plucking for me, ever!!!

  13. I am betting I have met the ‘little button’ if she uses mostly just tweezers!
    I cannot stand having even a little stray hair on my brows–I’m a bit OCD in that department.
    Happy y’all had fun–I LOVE that mall you went too!
    Can you share an after pic?

  14. LOL! Omigosh, this is hilarious!!! But do we get to see a finished picture?? Huh? Huh??

  15. That is such a funny story!

  16. I feel so left out. My eyebrows are blonde and you can’t see them. I pluck out the few rebel ones, but other than that…
    A makeup appointment sure sounds fun though!

  17. No pics!? *frowns*

    I need to take a weedwacker to mine every week. I think I’m the hairy-est asian in the world 🙁

  18. Dude. We totally need pics of the new brows.

  19. What a great story!!

    You have inspired me to get my brows done.

    Have you ever had them colored. The one and only time I have had mine waxed…I got talked into coloring them. Weird.

  20. jennifer h says:

    Pictures please!!!

    That was so funny. I’m just imagining the tweezer search.

    I’m due for an intervention. I try to schedule the brow wax pretty often, but I’m behind right now. Please don’t look too closely.

  21. Where’s the pics?

    I want Jeff and his little button to come over here for a bit.

  22. Thank you for this much needed giggle 🙂

  23. Well, I kinda pluck away at my own eyebrows but now I am feeling all kinds of insecure about my DIM (do-it-myself) mentality. Lord knows I’ll be staying clear of the MAC counter for awhile. I have just one question, how does anyone afford the constant maintenance that is manicure, pedicure, facial, eyebrow waxing, laser removal, teeth whitening, et. al.? Jesus, I can’t even swing an annual teeth cleaning.

  24. Betsy Bird says:

    I have the opposite problem — invisibrows. Given that I have really dark hair, it’s a strange look. I learned long ago that to look even halfway decent I have to draw them on, which is just as hard as tweezing/waxing them off for you hirsute gals. It’s even harder once you need reading glasses!

  25. First – can you say FUNNY! (I’m trying for a Jeff impersonation, but not sure if I am nailing it or not, considering I’ve never met the man)

    Second – Can we see pictures? Pretty, pretty please!

  26. baby~amore' says:

    OMG – that was funny – not that I laugh at a sista in distress . I can’t talk my eyebrows haven’t been touched in years.

    I need a hedge trimmer I think.

    You are just beautiful &hearts
    thanks for visiting me
    My Little Drummer boys

  27. Eyebrows are incredibly important, and mine are incredibly overlooked. Better go get to plucking. I don’t want to be sighed upon at a later date.

    Yay for you getting yourself pampered. Right on.

  28. I’m embarrassed to admit that other than a little home tweezing, I have never gotten any brow maintenance. That’s not to say I don’t need it. I guess I should look into it, huh?

    THanks for the post – and it was kinda funny.

  29. anglophilefootballfanatic says:

    Oh, my. I can only imagine. That is too funny. Thank God I don’t have to touch mine. Electrolysis is the shiznit.

  30. I agree with everyone else! Photos would be nice 🙂 LOL

    That is too funny though… and I still can’t imagine a guy doing my makeup.

  31. It sounded As if the world was being attacked!Too funny I keep on top of it, I have no buttons 🙁

  32. second eyebrow post I’ve read today… fine fine, I’ll actually LOOK at mine tomorrow…

  33. Tootsie Farklepants says:

    Can he do anything about those random hairs that sprout up overnight out of my chin? Find out!

  34. LOL! I can so relate. Mine are on steroids. They almost join in the middle. I never seem to make the time to get them done, plus, I don’t like pain.

  35. imaginary binky says:

    I’m actually trying to grow out my brows now. I’m guessing Jeff and his little button would die DEAD at the thought.

  36. Mackenzies Momma says:

    I think jeff, and his ‘little button’ would just flat out DIE if they got their hands on mauh. I am an eyebrow accident waiting to happen.

  37. Little button?? LMAO. And where are the pictures, missy?

  38. and I KNOW I need brow help…I just have severe trust issues 🙂


  39. Funny thing about eyebrows… you may not realize how badly you need to have them done until you go. Once it is over you may end up being surprised at what a huge difference it makes.

    I have always had a unibrow so waxing has been mandatory for me since I was about 14 or so.

    “Little Button”… LOL. Yer killin’ me!

  40. Burgh Baby's Mom says:

    I can almost hear the collective gasp. I wish I had thought to go for a makeup intervention the last time my caterpillar needed tamed–the freeness of the situation appeals to me.

  41. Sarah (Genesis Moments) says:

    Thanks so much for stopping by! I had my eyebrows waxed at a salon in January (for the first time in years) and made the accident of saying yes to the lip waxing when I didn’t really need it. It took 3 days to heal from the peeling and zits and red bumps that resulted. Uggh! Apparently I am more sensitive around my mouth than I thought possible!

    Gotta love makeovers!!!

  42. Getting in on the picture bandwagon…must see what the little button did for you!

  43. I’m pretty lucky…my brows have a pretty easy arch to deal with and thankfully they’ve never been too bushy. In fact, I’m thinking a professional beauty consultant would probably tell me to fill them in with pencil or powder since they are a little “sparse.”

  44. I wanna “buttons” person to come do my eyebrows! I NEED an intervention….but those cost MONEY!

    Thanks for coming by my blog! I LOVE seeing new people there!

  45. LMAO!! I know exactly what’s there…one gray strand that sticks out amongst all the rest. the other 5 grays are quietly hidden.

    Good grief, I love coming here. Thx for the giggle!

  46. Just lurking by for the first time. What a funny story, are your posts always that entertaining or did I just pick a good day to visit?

  47. I am so bad I have been known to SHAVE my way out a uni-brow in a pinch…oh, wait, did I just admit that in public…???

  48. Burgh Baby's Mom says:

    You want more comments over here? I’ll give you more comments over her.

  49. Burgh Baby's Mom says:

    Still not happy? Really? OK, fine. Here, have 49 comments.

  50. Burgh Baby's Mom says:

    Do you know how much I hate it when I notice that I made a typo in comments? I hate it mucho, mucho, mucho. I must now go slap myself around for typing “her” instead of “here.” I’m such a dumbass sometimes. A no-proofreading dumbass.

  51. anglophilefootballfanatic says:

    LEave it to Silly Billy Burgh to beat me to it. Witch..who I adore! And, plan to have a commitment cermony with….

  52. I don’t think I need brow help, but maybe I am in denial . . .

  53. Purple Teacup says:

    Why does the cool stuff ALWAYS happen to you?

  54. Burgh Baby's Mom says:

    I’m so glad I came back and was able to see that AFF is talking about me behind my back AGAIN. Witch. WHATEVER!

    Does Jeff have any friends in Pittsburgh? I really am in desperate need of an intervention.

  55. jennifer h says:

    I want to see you get a million more comments on this post (no matter how jealous that makes me…I mean, happy), so I’m leaving you one more!

    This post was fabulous, and so were the eyebrows.

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