Poor Abby.
She started out as an
only child.
Pampered.
The objection of affection.
Celebrated.
She had the
run of the house.
I mean she
ran the house…
And then a
human baby came along.
Poor Abby.
She was
fine for about a year.
Continuing as before…
until the human baby started walking.
Then her
50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance became a problem.
She is the most hyper bulldog I know.
She would get excited and
jump.
50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance jump.
Poor human baby.
During that first year the human baby seemed to always be
CONTAINED in something.
A swing.
A bouncy seat.
A walker.
A bouncer.
A stroller.
A crib.
These were all
Abby buffers.
Human baby safety bubbles.
When human baby began to
walk.
He
walked AWAY from the safety of the buffers.
He
walked TOWARD Abby.
It was just
too exciting for Abby – she
needed to greet human baby with
50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance.
She
needed to be put outside.
Poor Abby.
And that is how Abby ended up
an outdoor dog.
As she
aged she has gotten less hyper. As
she aged I have gotten more children.
Abby’s clout has
dropped. and
dropped. and
dropped.
Poor Abby.
She is still
50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance when the kids go outdoors to play.
For awhile I put her in a different part of the yard so she wouldn’t knock them down. Now that
both the kids and the dog are older I figure the
kids can outrun her.
Ryan (8) doesn’t have a problem with the dog. He just has a problem with
not wanting to go outside sometimes. The other day we had friends over and this was overheard:
McKenzie (8):
Your dog is so cute.
Ryan:
Does that mean you want to go out and see her?
Yes! Let’s go out and see her.
You don’t want to do that.
Why?
Our dog always bites new people.
Really?
Yes, our dog has bit me several times.
Oh.
Let’s go upstairs and play.
OK.
Poor Abby.
To set the record straight – Abby has never bit anyone in her life.
Blog-Stedman addressed the lies immediately. The next morning at breakfast I could
not stop thinking about it and brought it up again:
Me:
Ryan, why would you tell someone that Abby bit you?
Ryan:
Well, she might have tried once.
I would NEVER have a dog around that would bite! Never.
Don’t give away Abby! I love her.
Why would I give her away?
Because she bites people.
But she doesn’t. Why would you say that when it isn’t true?
Please don’t give my dog away!
Yes, this argument could have continued in this
circular manner for hours. By the end of the conversation I was on the defensive. Assuring
him that the dog was
going no where.
Poor me.
I say
bring the dog inside and put the
human out in the back yard…
She had the run of the house.
I mean she ran the house…
And then a human baby came along.
Poor Abby.
She was fine for about a year.
Continuing as before…
until the human baby started walking.
Then her 50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance became a problem.
She is the most hyper bulldog I know.
She would get excited and jump.
50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance jump.
Poor human baby.
During that first year the human baby seemed to always be CONTAINED in something.
A swing.
A bouncy seat.
A walker.
A bouncer.
A stroller.
A crib.
These were all Abby buffers.
Human baby safety bubbles.
When human baby began to walk.
He walked AWAY from the safety of the buffers.
He walked TOWARD Abby.
It was just too exciting for Abby – she needed to greet human baby with 50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance.
She needed to be put outside.
Poor Abby.
And that is how Abby ended up an outdoor dog.
As she aged she has gotten less hyper. As she aged I have gotten more children.
Abby’s clout has dropped. and dropped. and dropped.
Poor Abby.
She is still 50 lbs. of bulldog exuberance when the kids go outdoors to play.
For awhile I put her in a different part of the yard so she wouldn’t knock them down. Now that both the kids and the dog are older I figure the kids can outrun her.
Ryan (8) doesn’t have a problem with the dog. He just has a problem with not wanting to go outside sometimes. The other day we had friends over and this was overheard:
McKenzie (8): Your dog is so cute.
Ryan: Does that mean you want to go out and see her?
Yes! Let’s go out and see her.
You don’t want to do that.
Why?
Our dog always bites new people.
Really?
Yes, our dog has bit me several times.
Oh.
Let’s go upstairs and play.
OK.
Poor Abby.
To set the record straight – Abby has never bit anyone in her life.
Blog-Stedman addressed the lies immediately. The next morning at breakfast I could not stop thinking about it and brought it up again:
Me: Ryan, why would you tell someone that Abby bit you?
Ryan: Well, she might have tried once.
I would NEVER have a dog around that would bite! Never.
Don’t give away Abby! I love her.
Why would I give her away?
Because she bites people.
But she doesn’t. Why would you say that when it isn’t true?
Please don’t give my dog away!
Yes, this argument could have continued in this circular manner for hours. By the end of the conversation I was on the defensive. Assuring him that the dog was going no where.
Poor me.
I say bring the dog inside and put the human out in the back yard…
Hey , have you try to play with slot cars .I bought my slot car set from http://www.slotmotors.com they are cheap
i have a couple of rat dogs i could send you.
then abby would have something(s) to play with.
You have my dad’s favorite dog! He has wanted a bulldog for sooo long…my mom is prejudiced. She thinks they are stinky.
I can’t identify. We got our dog after our kids were born. He has grown up with them. Which has been kinda nice…except trying to potty train a kid and house break a puppy…not so nice.
I think Ryan should definitely go into law, or at least join the debate team. He had me convinced that you were giving his poor lovable dog away. Sheesh! What kind of mother are you anyway? 🙂
I will trade you Andy for Abby. He doesn’t bite or jump. And he sings. We are working on his tango. Do you want him this weekend?
That’s cute. But I just hate dogs. Sorry, no offense. I am just not a dog person. Even the chihuahuas we had were a pain. They had to go. I prefer cats. Actually I prefer babies. The kind that don’t bite. 🙂
I wish I oculd put a dog and my kids in the backyard. Alas, I dont have a backyard or a dog. I do have kids though.
Aaaand that’s why we don’t have a dog! Aaaand I put my kids in the backyard all of the time. Exactly where they should be!
See, Ryan has some scary-legal logic! Turn the conversation around so YOU feel bad, and take the focus away from the lie he told. What a master! 🙂
Poor Abby and moms have a LOT in common. I’ve heard my kids have very similar conversations about me as I’ve been put further and further out in the yard as they’ve become teenagers. 🙂