Ryan has been fascinated by China for awhile. We have read books about China. We have recorded TV shows about China. We have answered quite a few questions about China.
The other night we were walking and he declared that he was Chinese.
Out of the blue.
I am Chinese.
Uh…no.
There was no talking him out of the fact that China is not part of his heritage.
He kept arguing and arguing and arguing to the point where I in exasperation stated,
“You are NOT Chinese!”
As soon as I uttered the words, I realized that my streak for yelling ridiculous statements in November continues…I have noticed that every once in awhile I have “yelled” something unusual at my kids.
And by “yelling” I mean a hasty order with a slightly raised voice out of pure exasperation.
I first noted this phenomenon with the following phrase:
“Take the baby’s shoes out of the fridge!”–Holly, November 21, 2007
Yep, that is pretty unexpected, but I think I topped that with this:
“Who threw the anvil?”–Holly, November 2, 2008
I might even dare to say that no one in the history of the world
(outside of maybe an ACME cartoon character) has ever said those words.
Why does Holly own an anvil?
I don’t own an anvil. It is Ryan’s anvil.
Why did Holly’s oldest son own an anvil at the ripe age of 7?
He got it for Christmas a few Christmases ago.
Oh.
What?
Yep, when Ryan was 5 he got an anvil for Christmas. He opened the gift and said, “
Oh good! Just what I wanted!”
It was true. The anvil topped Ryan’s Christmas list that year. He was really into breaking rocks into smaller pieces with a hammer. He was sure that if he broke enough stones he would find a diamond.
When you use a hammer on stones, it is best to have an anvil. His anvil arrived from grandparents who also included protective eye wear. Overall it was his favorite gift.
So back to the anvil flying through the air…
Me:
Who threw the anvil?
Ryan: Uhhhh…it was an ACCIDENT!
No one accidentally throws an anvil.
I did.
How?
I was holding it above my head and my arms got tired.
Alright. I think there is a new house rule that anvils stay on the ground.
It just occurred to me that strange phrases
yelled at my kids often result in even more absurd rules.
It’s nice to know I am not the only one who says weird, goofy and unusual things to their kids! However, I would never buy my son an anvil, because I would be the one breaking my foot by running into it!
this TOTALLY reminded me of a similar situation last year. my daughter was sad at school when i was there volunteering. i asked what was bothering her. she said “a boy in my class said “Julie’s so stupid” (a black girl) “and I’m really sad because i’m part african american.” WHOA nelly… my family is as white as white can be. I tried to explain she wasn’t, she argued that I had told her she was. “Baby, you’re half HUNGARIAN, eastern european, not african. remember, grandma is 100% hungarian…okay sweetie? it’s nice that you were concerned. that wasn’t a nice thing for that boy to say.”
i’m going to write a blog on it on my site! thanks for the great story and triggering a memory for me.
I kind of like the baby shoes in the fridge…. Also, I swear I said that at one point as well…
OMG, an ANVIL? And I thought my boy had some odd requests….
and, yes, I do yell some strange things at my kids that I pray my neighbors didn’t overhear (but probably did) – I think the most recent was “for the love of GOD – don’t lick the walls!”
I once had to tell my son to stop playing his drums with his banana peel.
I can’t be as witty as Ms. Kalynne, but I am nodding along and smiling…
Well that was worth a great big laugh. I loved this story…too funny! And sadly 20 years from now…you’ll still be yelling stupid things at them. It never ends!
Oh, I love that he owns an anvil. And his arms got tired–he didn’t throw it, mom!
My son had his own decorative plunger for a couple of years. We would go the grocery store, he with his fancy plunger (unused, mind you) and careen through the store as PlungerMan! I’m sure people often wondered what a little boy was doing with a plunger in the produce section…