The boys get up early.
As in hours before daylight that God didn’t intend for people to BE AWAKE or He would have sent the sun earlier, early.
After several years of Nirvana management I came up with a clever scheme to assure that I didn’t see the boys TOO EARLY.
At first, before they could tell time, we set the TV to automatically come on at 6:30. They were allowed to come down and watch TV when they heard Peep’s theme song.
As the boys have matured the rules have slightly changed. They can now tell time so no one is allowed out of their bed before 6:15 and no one is allowed downstairs until all three boys are fully dressed AND (not OR) it is past 6:30.
This means the boys pick out their own clothes. They and are assisted by a 7 y/o fashion director. Some days their clothes match. Other days…not so much.
Really, not matching is no big deal. But during three months out of the Texas calendar, weather makes it a big deal. The boys are used to wearing shorts, t-shirts and crocs 24/7. Long pants are difficult to endure, socks are painful and a coat is downright torture.
Last Friday the outside temperature dipped into the *gasp* 30s. We were scheduled to do a little hike with friends OUTDOORS. We were to meet them at 10:00.
6:30–Three boys dressed in shorts and t-shirts run down the stairs.
7:00–breakfast, discussion of plans…excitement builds for the days activities until I mention we will have to change clothes.
7:30–all joy has left the Nirvana household. Grumbling and bargaining ensue.
8:00–I go upstairs to pick out alternative, warmer clothes.
8:45–Gnashing of teeth.
9:00–Two older boys have been threatened into submission of warmer attire.
9:01–Time to take on the 2 y/o…
Yes, it is the classic battle of MOM vs. TODDLER.
Will years of mommy on-the-job training win out?
Will the crafty toddler’s unconventional play ruin the game plan?
The game starts as expected. Mom uses size and strength to her advantage by holding down toddler limbs while stuffing them into long sleeves and pant legs. The toddler utilizes his massive lung capacity as an effective defense.
Luckily this mother has been training for a long time and holds not only determination, but endurance. The clothes are donned.
The mother applies socks to the flailing legs but realizes that she is outmatched when it comes to tying shoes onto such a persistent offense. She gives up the point and allows the crocs over socks.
The mother then pulls out the dreaded coat. The toddler screams in horror. The mother delays the game by taking the coat in the car.
When the destination is reached, the mother attempts to place the coat on the child. The toddler’s quick spinning and melting moves are too quick for the mother…it appears that this point will go to the toddler.
The mother feigns defeat. The mother leads the toddler on the hike sans coat.
What is this mother thinking?
It is COLD!
Three minutes pass in the windy 35 degree woods.
The mother asks the toddler if he is cold.
Would the toddler like to wear the coat the mother lovingly brought?
*insert end of game celebration here*