I had reserved a rental car through one of those online price comparision sites and chosen the cheapest mid-size car. We were not going to be staying on the strip so we would be in need of a car.
We arrived in Vegas and made our way to the car rental place which ended up to be a line of colossal proportions.
We waited. And waited. And waited.
Finally, I get to the desk, sign the paperwork and head to the parking lot to find our car.
Our car.
Our car was a stripped down sedan shell of a car.
It barely had a steering wheel.
I was not amused, but we reluctantly got in our car.
It smelled bad.
It smelled really really bad.
It pretty much stunk.
I wanted to go get a different car, but there was no way blog-Stedman was going back to the desk to re-enter the line of colossal proportions.
So we drive off in the smelly sedan skeleton.
We had gone about 3 miles and had the following conversation:
Him(frustrated): My seat warmer is on.
Me(mocking): This car doesn’t have seat warmers, it doesn’t even have power windows. It must be the sun from where it was parked. We are in Vegas, baby*!
*the baby was added to this story for dramatic effect and did not appear in the actual story.
2 miles later:
Him(exasperated): My seat warmer is on!
Me(exasperated and mocking): THIS CAR DOESN’T HAVE SEAT WARMERS. Why would they need seat warmers in this part of the country? It is January. It is 70 degrees.
1 mile later:
Him(exasperated and desperate): My butt is burning! Get the manual out of the glove compartment and look up how to turn off these seat warmers.
Me(assured and being reassuring): There are NO seat warmers in this car. They don’t need them here and this pile of junk wouldn’t have them anyway.
Right then, no mileage has accrued:
Him(exasperated, desperate and close to tears?): My butt is burning if you don’t get the manual and turn my seat warmer off I am going to stop this car on the side of the road and do it myself.
Me(quietly offended at being spoken to in that manner): Well, OK.
So, I look in the manual and found the seat warmer page*…
*CRAP! A whole page dedicated to seat warmers in this manual is not a good sign for my side of the argument.
…and found the switch*…
*CRAP! There was a switch!
…which could only mean*…
*Really people, put two and two together
..that car had no business having seat warmers.A few years ago in celebration of our 15th wedding anniversary, I took blog-Stedman to Las Vegas.
I made all the arrangements as a surprise.
He really doesn’t like to travel and he hates surprises so I obviously wasn’t paying attention in our marriage at that point, but that is not this story.
I had reserved a rental car through one of those online price comparision sites and chosen the cheapest mid-size car. We were not going to be staying on the strip so we would be in need of a car.
We arrived in Vegas and made our way to the car rental place which ended up to be a line of colossal proportions.
We waited. And waited. And waited.
Finally, I get to the desk, sign the paperwork and head to the parking lot to find our car.
Our car.
Our car was a stripped down sedan shell of a car.
It barely had a steering wheel.
I was not amused, but we reluctantly got in our car.
It smelled bad.
It smelled really really bad.
It pretty much stunk.
I wanted to go get a different car, but there was no way blog-Stedman was going back to the desk to re-enter the line of colossal proportions.
So we drive off in the smelly sedan skeleton.
We had gone about 3 miles and had the following conversation:
Him(frustrated): My seat warmer is on.
Me(mocking): This car doesn’t have seat warmers, it doesn’t even have power windows. It must be the sun from where it was parked. We are in Vegas, baby*!
*the baby was added to this story for dramatic effect and did not appear in the actual story.
2 miles later:
Him(exasperated): My seat warmer is on!
Me(exasperated and mocking): THIS CAR DOESN’T HAVE SEAT WARMERS. Why would they need seat warmers in this part of the country? It is January. It is 70 degrees.
1 mile later:
Him(exasperated and desperate): My butt is burning! Get the manual out of the glove compartment and look up how to turn off these seat warmers.
Me(assured and being reassuring): There are NO seat warmers in this car. They don’t need them here and this pile of junk wouldn’t have them anyway.
Right then, no mileage has accrued:
Him(exasperated, desperate and close to tears?): My butt is burning if you don’t get the manual and turn my seat warmer off I am going to stop this car on the side of the road and do it myself.
Me(quietly offended at being spoken to in that manner): Well, OK.
So, I look in the manual and found the seat warmer page*…
*CRAP! A whole page dedicated to seat warmers in this manual is not a good sign for my side of the argument.
…and found the switch*…
*CRAP! There was a switch!
…which could only mean*…
*Really people, put two and two together
..that car had no business having seat warmers.
I had reserved a rental car through one of those online price comparision sites and chosen the cheapest mid-size car. We were not going to be staying on the strip so we would be in need of a car.
We arrived in Vegas and made our way to the car rental place which ended up to be a line of colossal proportions.
We waited. And waited. And waited.
Finally, I get to the desk, sign the paperwork and head to the parking lot to find our car.
Our car.
Our car was a stripped down sedan shell of a car.
It barely had a steering wheel.
I was not amused, but we reluctantly got in our car.
It smelled bad.
It smelled really really bad.
It pretty much stunk.
I wanted to go get a different car, but there was no way blog-Stedman was going back to the desk to re-enter the line of colossal proportions.
So we drive off in the smelly sedan skeleton.
We had gone about 3 miles and had the following conversation:
Him(frustrated): My seat warmer is on.
Me(mocking): This car doesn’t have seat warmers, it doesn’t even have power windows. It must be the sun from where it was parked. We are in Vegas, baby*!
*the baby was added to this story for dramatic effect and did not appear in the actual story.
2 miles later:
Him(exasperated): My seat warmer is on!
Me(exasperated and mocking): THIS CAR DOESN’T HAVE SEAT WARMERS. Why would they need seat warmers in this part of the country? It is January. It is 70 degrees.
1 mile later:
Him(exasperated and desperate): My butt is burning! Get the manual out of the glove compartment and look up how to turn off these seat warmers.
Me(assured and being reassuring): There are NO seat warmers in this car. They don’t need them here and this pile of junk wouldn’t have them anyway.
Right then, no mileage has accrued:
Him(exasperated, desperate and close to tears?): My butt is burning if you don’t get the manual and turn my seat warmer off I am going to stop this car on the side of the road and do it myself.
Me(quietly offended at being spoken to in that manner): Well, OK.
So, I look in the manual and found the seat warmer page*…
*CRAP! A whole page dedicated to seat warmers in this manual is not a good sign for my side of the argument.
…and found the switch*…
*CRAP! There was a switch!
…which could only mean*…
*Really people, put two and two together
..that car had no business having seat warmers.
Hey –
Do you have one of those wordle or gorble things that tells you all the words that you use the most in your blog? And when are we getting together. I am thinking it is time for a facial and it is DEFINITELY time for a pedicure.
Any plans??
Dorothy
Oh and there is a new Scentsy warmer for June for Dad’s who are golfers. I don’t know if blog-Stedman golfes but it is an idea. Check it out and call me.
And one to file for future use? A friend of ours in a police officer who has an unofficial policy that he will not write a ticket to anyone who can give a unique excuse for speeding. We live in South Florida and have a very large population of…older citizens. One such gentleman was caught speeding down A1A when he announced to the officer that he couldn’t set his seat warmer off and his butt was burning.
He was sent on toasting his buns but ticketless…
That would SO happen to me. I would have automatically assumed the car was on fire and pulled over after the second time he said something.
OMG, this story just made my day! That was a hilarious story. And, you’re totally right about that car having no business having seat warmers.
…how does a car that doesnt have power windows have a seat warmer?
I was getting worried that it really didn’t have seat warmers. That would have been a much bigger problem. Love the way you told this story.
I’d be right there with you insisting there were no seat warmers. Why would there be in Vegas?
See this is where I would have said I will believe you when your pants are on fire.
Damn…I can’t top “rump roast.”
So I’ll just read quietly.
That is hilarious! 1. because it’s in the past and we might as well laugh now. 2. Because it didn’t happen to me… and 3. Someone of the male gender actually asked you to look at the directions.. a manual….that is freakin unbelievable!!!
Great story! One time my mom accidentally turned on the seat warmer in my car and didn’t know it. She thought she had wet her pants.