How To Minimize Toddler Tantrums {Advice from Real Moms)

Toddler tantrums.

It makes me just shudder to think about it.  With one of my kids, he didn’t wait until he was a toddler.  He had his first full-blown tantrum at 10 months {he has always been an over-achiever}.  I sat there shocked and just watched thinking…we are in for bumpy toddler years!
Help for Toddler Tantrums - Kids Activities Blog

What to Do About Toddler Tantrums

I had read EVERY parenting book ever written {very slight exaggeration} so when the tantrums started, I knew my first line of defense was to be consistent and not GIVE IN to a tantrum.  That is great in theory, but doesn’t lessen the pain of the tantrum.

You picked the wrong mom if you think I am going to give into kicking and screaming!

What worked best for me with my strong-willed child was to really try to avoid situations where tantrums would happen.  He did better with advance warning, proper sleep, plenty of fresh air and activities structured to avoid power struggles.

He is strong willed…he got it from me.

I also found out later that he had some sensory issues which made him over-react to average things.  Once I identified this, it was easier to realize he wasn’t acting BADLY, he didn’t have the coping skills to deal with the situation at that time.

My other two were easier to distract, talk out of, and get giggling during a tantrum – all which are much more fun than a power struggle.

 

 

 

How To Minimize Toddler Tantrums

Here are some of the best answers from our Facebook community

We asked how other moms deal with tantrums and here are some really good answers:

It may be food related.   We have cut out certain foods and noticed a massive change in behavior.
Give him some time to burn off steam during the day. Try taking him to a nearby park for a few hours or even outside in the backyard so he can release any pent up energy. I started doing this with my daughter who had the same issues, the difference in her attitude was amazing.
When our daughter hits, we ask, “Do you need a hug?” Sometimes she says yes, sometimes no, but we’re reaching out, and slowly teaching a better way to express emotions.
Don’t call it time out, but place him in a “calm down” spot.   Tell him, “I understand you are upset, when you are calm you may come talk to me nicely.”

How To Minimize Toddler Tantrums

These are some of our favorite toddler tantrum resources

Luckily there are tons of different ways to deal with this and every child is different.  Here are some of our favorites – affiliate links support Kids Activities Blog.

A book for mom: The Happiest Toddler On The Block by Harvey Karp

A book for kids: Hands Are Not For Hitting by Martine Agassi Ph.D.

A way to soothe: Overtired and Cranky Shampoo and Bodywash from California Baby

Here are even more great articles for you

Yoga for Better Behavior from Parents Magazine
The main thing is that YOU don’t get overwhelmed and make the situation worse.  I know from personal experience that this time will pass {although some days are very long} and that kids will eventually gain the skills necessary to control themselves.  If you can stand back with some perspective, it makes it easier to endure.
And on really hard days, just remember that I am sending you a hug…I have been there!

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