Hip, hip hooray…it is Monday!
Monday can only mean one thing. If you look Monday up in the dictionary, you see the definition: POTLUCK.
Today’s potluck is a celebration. Why? The Nirvana made Fussy’s Linkapalooza for my Fight the Frump post on Friday. In honor of this momentous occasion today’s potluck will be held on cloud 9. That would be the actual cloud 9, not the shady looking strip club off the freeway just outside of Abilene with the same name. Which brings me to broach this sensitive subject…
One of you arrived after googling, “Nude photos of Mrs. June Cleaver”. Now, I am just going to turn my back and you may leave quickly and quietly and we will forget this all happened. I think we all know that those types of searches are just wrong. Thank you. Oh, don’t you just love, love, love the new graphics for that segment? Thanks to the genius of Nap Warden all my crazy whims come true.
I have even swept the floor (just in case Fussy or any of her friends drop in) and it is Frito free:
For today’s potluck I am contributing my world famous animal shaped Belgium waffles.
You may choose from a barn, a rooster, a cow or another different shaped cow. You must choose quickly or my shapist children will leave you with this:
Yes, this is the dreaded headless cow. For some reason headless animals are shunned. I can not properly correlate this since the first thing my children do is eat the head. I try to push the headless animals with the catchy slogan, “just think of it as bite 2”.
Please excuse the interruption by the I.F.P.A. (Institute For Potluck Advancement):
My baby he don’t talk sweet
He ain’t got much to say
But he loves me, loves me, loves me
I know that he loves me anyway
And maybe he don’t dress fine
But i don’t really mind
Because every time he pulls me near
I just want to cheer
Lets hear it for the potluck
Lets give the potluck a hand
Lets hear it for my potluck
You know you potluck to understand
Whoa, maybe he’s no romeo
But he’s my lovin potluck show
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Let’s hear it for the potluck
Great, the IFPA may have observed me dancing to Jennifer’s posted music video causing nostalgia for 80s music. I don’t think changing the words of an 80s song to include “potluck” is helping the universal potluck objective. It is just the tip of the iceberg with these IFPA guys. I am not happy with their work to date. In fact, I came across this:
This is the Nirvana’s master plan. Please note if the IFPA could get their act together I would be 2/3 in my quest for world wide blog domination. They are so fired unless they come up with something better.
I need to apologize to a fellow blogger, name sharer and play date friend, Holly for throwing her under the bus at Tootsie’s Weekly Advice column. I may have come across a little harsh in my assessment of the jon-jon. I may have wanted to look cool in class. I may have wanted to re-direct the attention somewhere else. After some soul-searching, I can admit to 1 (maybe 2) of my boys wearing jon-jons after the age of 18 months. Admitting that I have a problem is step one. Excuse me while I finish my Tootsie recommended home renovation…
*while Holly is out of the room, the IFPA guys walk in, see an opportunity and post this:*
The Ginsu 12 Piece POTLUCK Set Features:
Ginsu POTLUCKS are specialized for their dexterity in chopping, slicing and dicing a wide array of foods.
Ginsu POTLUCKS are forged from Japanese steel that is known for its stain and rust resistance, strength, and its ability to hold an incredibly sharp edge.
Ginsu POTLUCK handles are made of heat and water resistant resin.
This fabulous POTLUCK set includes an incredibly strong and visually stunning bamboo POTLUCK block.
*Holly returns. Holly reads. Holly rants. Holly can’t believe it. Holly is irate. Holly won’t stand for this nonsense on her blog. Holly exchanges blows with the IFPA. Holly is victorious (Holly has spent many an afternoon observing karate classes). Holly kicks some IFPA butt. Holly is all that and a bag of chips. Holly wonders how long people will continue to read this crap written in the third person.*
I now want to apologize to Fussy and any of her fabulous friends that came to visit today. Really, this is a celebration. It should not have come to blows. I want you to know that I realize how this reflects on me. I will do better. I will work harder. My next post will be better. By Friday’s fight the frump, I should have my “A” game back…